# Suit and Boat Shoes? Advice Needed (Obviously!)



## e moneybags (Apr 23, 2008)

Hey gang, 
Short time lurker, first time poster here.. Really like the forum! I already sent the following to Andy and received a response, and have received some generally mixed emotions to my idea below. Figured I would post it to the group and see what happens. (Also, with my minimal understanding of _trad_ I apologize if this post has made it's way into the wrong forum.)

Thanks in advance,
E

*Hi Andy, *
*I am registering to the forum so I can pose this question to the crowd, but in the meantime I wanted your take..*

*I am getting married in the late summer in New England on the shore. Not actually on the beach, but on the grass next to the beach. The wedding will have lots of nice bright colors including bi-color daises with yellow and orange, and the bridesmaids will be in light green dresses. It's going to be a slightly casual affair considering the location and our personalities. *

*So for the wedding the groomsmen and I decided we would buy a new suit rather than rent an oversized tux. More expensive for sure, but we all want to look sharp. We went with a 3 button CK charcoal suit from Men's WH. Between a few of the other groomsmen and I we have had a good experience there.. Here is the suit:*

*https://www.menswearhouse.com/menswear/detail.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=1408474395563272&FOLDER%3C%3EbrowsePath=1408474395563272&bmUID=1207801624410*

*The suit is pretty sharp and we have some decisions left to make on shirt/tie combo and footwear. I think my shirt and tie will differ slightly from that of my groomsmen, but will be based on a theme. *

*The shoes are my dilemma. My style is somewhat unusual as it is. I don't always dress up, but when I do I like to be coordinated but eye catching. Hopefully not usually in a bad way.. I have some three-tone Sperry Top Siders that match different shirts and belts just as a little bit of an accent. I think it's fun. *

*So for the wedding, I was thinking of doing boat shoes. Why not? We are on the beach, will be dancing all night, and frankly they are one of my favorite shoe types. I'm imaging buying a shoe and not wearing it outdoors until the wedding its self so it is still looking crisp and sharp. I found some GBX slip on's and boat shoes that grabbed my eye and I thought tying them in with a tie or pocket square matching the accent stitching on the shoe might just pop a little bit, but still keep things classy. Here's some of the shoes I was thinking about:*




*How far off base am I? Can we pull it off? Does the circumstance lend its self to going out on a bit of a limb here? Or is this totally forbidden? *

*I did what I could searching the forums and didn't come up with much useful info. I doubt this is totally uncharted territory however... *

*Look forward to your thoughts, and have a good one!*
*E*


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## gar1013 (Sep 24, 2007)

Suits and boat shoes just don't go.  I'd say go as casual as loafers, but no further.


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## Northeastern (Feb 11, 2007)

First of all, welcome to the forum.

As to your question...I would not wear a charcoal suit with boat shoes. I probably wouldn't wear any suit with boat shoes, but I'm willing to give a khaki cotton suit the benefit of the doubt for now. In any case, for your wedding I would stick with a traditional dress shoe and try a fun, summery tie and square combo to fit in with the beach theme. 

If you were wearing a blazer and reds or chinos then I would say go for the boat shoes, but a charcoal wool suit and those shoes you posted just does not work on any level for me.

Hope that helped, let us know how you progress with this idea.


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## Quay (Mar 29, 2008)

Northeastern said:


> First of all, welcome to the forum.
> 
> As to your question...I would not wear a charcoal suit with boat shoes. I probably wouldn't wear any suit with boat shoes, but I'm willing to give a khaki cotton suit the benefit of the doubt for now. In any case, for your wedding I would stick with a traditional dress shoe and try a fun, summery tie and square combo to fit in with the beach theme.
> 
> ...


Well said. The only time boat shoes and a suit might work is if you were getting married on the deck of a ship. Then if everyone was wearing them it might be a theme of some sort. But short of that, suits and boat shoes can only be gotten away with if you're a cheeky boarding school lad or lass who's trying to walk on the knife-edge of a dress code. And even then it doesn't always work. :icon_smile:

In any case or dress, though, sincere congratulations on your wedding. I wish you joy.

Cordially,
A.Q.


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## tabasco (Jul 17, 2006)

I hope you have a great time at the wedding and a happy marriage. 

To get off on the right foot...don't do it. It will look really bad....tacky, when standing next to the bridesmaids. And I'll bet THEY'RE not wearing flip-flops!

Besides, dancing in boat shoes is hard to do...you want a leather sole.

But, if you must, pink boat shoes might look good with charcoal grey. 

- hippie wedding veteran


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## Ron_A (Jun 5, 2007)

Congratulations on your pending nuptials. Even on the Trad forum, I don't think you're going to find much support for the idea of pairing boat shoes with a suit -- especially those hideous GBX shoes that you're considering(no offense), and especially at a wedding (even if it's your own). 

Stick with something a little more traditional and classic. I understand that you may want to be "fun" and "wacky", but you really want to look classy for what will surely be one of the most important and memorable days of your life. Just my $.02.


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## paper clip (May 15, 2006)

Welcome and sincere congratulations on your upcoming wedding.

With a true suit, I would not advise wearing boat shoes, especially those multi-colored ones.

If you're insistent on something casual and not a true lace-up, how about burgundy penny loafers ? - those are casual, yet, you are still be wearing a presentable leather soled shoe, and it's a shoe most men can use as part of a regular shoe line-up after the wedding.

IMHO, you don't want to do something cute or goofy for your wedding. Those pictures and memories last a long time. You want to be proud that for this important life altering (pardon the pun) occasion, you were dressed with dignity.

Good luck!


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## Green3 (Apr 8, 2008)

Could one do topsiders with a seersucker for a casual event? Or is that some sort of sartorial mixed metaphor...


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## gar1013 (Sep 24, 2007)

Green3 said:


> Could one do topsiders with a seersucker for a casual event? Or is that some sort of sartorial mixed metaphor...


I think seersuck requires bucks... white certainly works, dirty might as well.


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## mcarthur (Jul 18, 2005)

Welcome to the forum. Congratulations on your forecoming marriage. Suits and boat shoes mix as well as oil and water.


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

When a friend of mine got married in an outdoor setting beside a waterfall, he wore a white tux with sneakers, white Converse All-Stars if memory serves me right. She was barefoot in a wedding gown. Her name was Mary Jane, which somehow seemed appropriate. :icon_smile_big: Of course that was 1970 and times were different; however, it was an enjoyable wedding and they are still married 38 years later with both of them being very successful business people. We all grow up, don't we?

While I certainly don't always dress the way most of the other folks here do, I think that boat shoes will look more costumey today than perhaps my friends looked in 1970. At the same time, if your heart is set on it and you fully intend to wear a shoe this casual; a sneaker along the lines of the All-Star will probably look better, ala Paul McCartney.

Cruiser


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## tripreed (Dec 8, 2005)

If you insist on wearing something other than dark dress shoes, I suggest going for something like this look with the white bucs (though, I believe it too will be met with mixed reviews here).


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## Orsini (Apr 24, 2007)

Personally, I would not do this, particularly as you will be wearing a lounge suit in a color that is very appropriate for business. I suggest AE Park Avenues or the (functional) equivalent. As it will be a long evening and it is _*your*_ wedding, you could change to an outfit more suitable for dancing on (or near) the beach later, assuming this meets with the approval of the bride. If so, spectators and a linen or seersucker suit might be nice...


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## gar1013 (Sep 24, 2007)

Here's one other thing to remember: this is your wedding. If all goes well, it may be your only one (depending on the definition of going well).

Act and dress accordingly, because you don't want to regret things later! :icon_smile:


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

Welcome to the forum and here's one more nail in the boatshoe coffin! A more appropriate, and yet casual, option would be burgundy calf tassel loafers. A pair of AE Graysons would be perfect! :icon_smile:


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## Spence (Feb 28, 2006)

I've attended many weddings in Newport, RI in the summer (my wife is in the business) and I would echo everyone above and say it will look silly.

For a wedding in the grass near the shore, like at the lawn at Oceancliff, the men will typically wear suits or a tux in the late afternoon with normal dress shoes as the event will be outside for only the very brief ceremony...then into the ballroom for the evening.

If the ceremony was to be held entirely outside and very informal then I'd say ditch the suits and go with smart casual wear or a very tropical suit.

-spence


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## e moneybags (Apr 23, 2008)

oh no! :icon_headagainstwal

Well, my hopes have been dashed much to my chagrin (and my soon to be mother in law's delight no doubt)!

Ok. So my next question is, HOW crazy can I go with this? I like the white bucs idea.. I am looking for something a little out of the ordinary (as you can imagine). So will some slip-on's or driving moc style shoes in the correct color suffice, or still unacceptable? Does it _HAVE_ to be something traditional? <say like you would when you ask your mom if you _HAVE_ to go to school today???/>

(I am not particularly enamored with GBX but while we're on the subject..)

Thanks again everyone! Good remarks so far. Please keep them rolling in!

E

And I will share Andy's email response if anyone is curious..


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## e moneybags (Apr 23, 2008)

And my apologies, I meant to say thanks to you all for the kudos on the wedding.. Should be fun for sure, both the wedding and the marriage! 

Thanks again,
E


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## Sartre (Mar 25, 2008)

Too late now, but if I were of a mind to do something "out there," I might not have started with a charcoal suit, which is sort of the epitome of classic, understated (not to say even boring) trad style. Maybe you could use that as an advantage, though, and accessorize in a way that adds some dash. The white bucks idea could be fun, especially if you paired them with a white or blue OCBD shirt and madras bow tie. I think you could also get away with loafers (dare I say black or brown tasseled loafers) sans socks.

TJS


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## Spence (Feb 28, 2006)

With a suit? You are joking right? I'd listen to the above...

-spence


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## Bird's One View (Dec 31, 2007)

I like black and white spectators with a charcoal suit.


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## nerdykarim (Dec 13, 2005)

Congrats on your upcoming wedding!

I agree with the posters who are less-than-enthusiastic about boat shoes with a charcoal suit, but I think that if you choose to roll with it, the black patent boat shoe from Sperry would be best for the occasion.

Alternatively, a very casual khaki suit would work with a "traditional" brown boat shoe, but it would change the tone of the wedding substantially.


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## Orsini (Apr 24, 2007)

e moneybags said:


> ...and my soon to be mother in law's delight no doubt...


Yes, the miserable in-laws will mark, and remember! And you will hear about it for the rest of your life!


e moneybags said:


> I like the white bucs idea..


Thank you for reminding me. That looked perfectly hideous!

Good luck!


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## Philip12 (Aug 24, 2005)

Don't do it. Really. I know a guy who often wears suits with boat shoes at work, and he's the laughing stock of his colleagues.


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## wnh (Nov 4, 2006)

e moneybags said:


> So my next question is, HOW crazy can I go with this? I like the white bucs idea.. I am looking for something a little out of the ordinary (as you can imagine). So will some slip-on's or driving moc style shoes in the correct color suffice, or still unacceptable? Does it _HAVE_ to be something traditional?


It doesn't _have_ to be traditional, but keep in mind you're going to be looking at these pictures (as will your kids and grandkids, etc.) for the next 50 years or more (you should, at least). You want to have 'fun' now, but I'd say let the dress be standard and let the experience be fun. You may think boat shoes (or some similiar non-standard option) will be a fun/funny idea, but odds are your opinion will be far different in a year or so.

You want your kids to think of your wedding as "That looks like it was fun" rather than "Dad, those are the stupidest shoes you could have possibly worn."


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## Intrepid (Feb 20, 2005)

*e Troll ?*

In keeping with some of the other footwear that you are considering, you might think about LLB Maine hunting boots, because of the sand.

Anything over six inches might be too informal.

You might also want to consider footwear that you could wear with your charcoal suit in occasions after the wedding.

My personal favorites with a charcoal suit would be either be Chuck Taylor Converse, black high tops, or Red Wing steel toe, six inch boots.

Good luck.


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## Patrick06790 (Apr 10, 2005)

^ I was in a wedding many years ago. We wore black Chucks instead of the plastic shoes that came with our rented tuxes.

I haven't ever seen photos, but I am sure we looked slightly less foul because of it.


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## bandofoutsiders (Jul 26, 2007)

I wear boat shoes in the summer with seersucker or poplin suits. The trousers have very tapered bottoms, absolutely no break at the ankle. I go sockless. The suit you listed is too formal for boat shoes, which tend to look better with lighter suits, especially khaki, and navy blue.

Still, never say never. I think this look is pulled off well. I like how the formality of the dinner suit is offset by the sperrys and oxford cloth shirt.









So maybe you can pull it off afterall. It's risky for a wedding.


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## nringo (Oct 5, 2007)

There was actually a picture in GQ this month of a khaki cotton suit w/ top-siders and it looked pretty good.

I think that would be the only type of suit that they would work with.


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## tabasco (Jul 17, 2006)

Bird's One View said:


> I like black and white spectators with a charcoal suit.


I like this idea also. But only for the groom.

Groomsmen need to be unobtrusive to let the bridesmaids sparkle.

GTH is just that.
Elegance endures.


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## A. Clay-More (Dec 5, 2007)

Son of ,Cruiser.


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

wnh said:


> You want your kids to think of your wedding as "That looks like it was fun" rather than "Dad, those are the stupidest shoes you could have possibly worn."


Actually to many folks it is the fact that old pictures look silly that makes them fun to look at years later. My daughter couldn't care less about pictures of me in a proper suit tie from years gone by but let her run across one of me from 35 years ago with shoulder length hair and a shirt with flowers all over it and she loves it. Come to think of it, I do too. :icon_smile_big:

It's funny how so many of the crazy things we do in our youth turn into pleasant memories as we age.

Cruiser


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## e moneybags (Apr 23, 2008)

I agree with Cruiser to the effect that now in my youth is the time to do these stupid things and then they can live on in photos and stories....

Oh well. I am fading fast on the idea, but have not abandoned all hope. Once the suit is tailored and in my possession I will have a variety of shoes to debate with the bride, bridesmaids, and groomsmen. :icon_smile_big:

Have a good weekend all, and thanks for the thoughts!


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

A. Clay-More said:


> Son of ,Cruiser.


Can you explain that comment?

I was almost 40 years old when I got married back in 1986 so it was a fairly informal ceremony with only a few close family and friends. FWIW, I wore black captoe bals.

https://img378.imageshack.us/my.php?image=scan0023qw8.gif

I'm getting a little tired of some of these stupid comments.

Cruiser


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## KenR (Jun 22, 2005)

And I bet you looked great that day, Cruiser.

Keep to the traditional. Trying to get too hip makes you look too clever by half.


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## Senator LooGAR (Apr 19, 2008)

I'm new too. First post. Boat shoes might be trad, but they looked bad 50 years ago, and look worse today. A trend that should end. NOW.


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## wnh (Nov 4, 2006)

Cruiser said:


> Actually to many folks it is the fact that old pictures look silly that makes them fun to look at years later. My daughter couldn't care less about pictures of me in a proper suit tie from years gone by but let her run across one of me from 35 years ago with shoulder length hair and a shirt with flowers all over it and she loves it. Come to think of it, I do too. :icon_smile_big:
> 
> It's funny how so many of the crazy things we do in our youth turn into pleasant memories as we age.
> 
> Cruiser


Oh, so it's a good idea to dress like a buffoon so you can have some "pleasant memories" in the years to come? Come on. I understand that it's often beneficial to offer a counterpoint, but do you have to be a contrarian on _every_ issue? (For the record, I expect your response to be: "No. I'm not a contrarian.")

To the OP: It would be a good idea to wear a tweed jacket, seersucker shorts, tuxedo t-shirt, top hat, and wellies to your wedding, because you'll laugh about it later. That's apparently what Cruiser might do.


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

wnh said:


> Oh, so it's a good idea to dress like a buffoon so you can have some "pleasant memories" in the years to come? Come on. I understand that it's often beneficial to offer a counterpoint, but do you have to be a contrarian on _every_ issue? (For the record, I expect your response to be: "No. I'm not a contrarian.")


Actually my response to you is that I don't really give a rat's behind what you think of my comment. Besides, from your profile you aren't much more than a kid so I doubt that you know much about memories anyway. In 35 years when you are all grown up you may think differently. Ah, the ignorance of youth. I'm not being critical of you. I was the same way when I was a kid.

And as to what I might do, back up a few posts and you will see what I did rather than what I "might do."

Cruiser


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## Patrick06790 (Apr 10, 2005)

Cruiser said:


> Actually my response to you is that I don't really give a rat's behind what you think of my comment.
> 
> Cruiser


I've often wondered where one would obtain a rat's behind.


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

Patrick06790 said:


> I've often wondered where one would obtain a rat's behind.


Well if Cruiser won't give one, luckily SOMEONE will step in:


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

On a related note, is this trad?


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

videocrew said:


> Well if Cruiser won't give one, luckily SOMEONE will step in:


Don't you just love "_The Onion_"? Thanks for stepping in for me. Of course some say I need all the help I can get. :icon_smile_big:

Cruiser


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## A. Clay-More (Dec 5, 2007)

WNH, back up a few posts and check out what Cruiser did. And then do the *opposite.*
You do want to retain some class, don't you? :icon_smile_wink:


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## tripreed (Dec 8, 2005)

I'm no moderator, but this thread has become stupid and peoples' bickering needs to move somewhere else.


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## wnh (Nov 4, 2006)

Cruiser said:


> Actually my response to you is that I don't really give a rat's behind what you think of my comment. Besides, from your profile you aren't much more than a kid so I doubt that you know much about memories anyway. In 35 years when you are all grown up you may think differently.


Okay, seriously. This is a forum dedicated to men's clothing. We're clothes horses and clothing nerds. So this guy gets on with a question about wearing boat shoes -- ugly boat shoes, even -- with a suit, and the general consensus is that it's not a good idea, because, again, we're clothing nerds and that's why we're here.

You have a point that we can often look back and laugh at what we wore and the things we did. I may not be "much more than a kid", but I'm shockingly old enough to have made memories, and can look back at things I wore while in grade school and have a good little chuckle. But why get on this clothing forum, in this thread specifically, to say something that is more or less a message of "Go ahead and wear something that will look bad, because it'll be funny later"?


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## Orsini (Apr 24, 2007)

wnh said:


> Okay, seriously. This is a forum dedicated to men's clothing. We're clothes horses and clothing nerds...


Well, that's really the problem, then, isn't it? Some members post here not because they have any interest in wardrobe, but to derail the discussion and upset the other members. That is what is known as a troll (_Handy definition of a *Troll*..._).

The best course of action for a troll, even a super troll, is to not take the bait, ignore them, and just scroll on by...

Actually, the "twit filter" works quite well for this...


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## donk93953 (Feb 8, 2007)

May I suggest abit of a departure from your original plan of suits....try a DB blue blazer with white/cream/dark gray slacks ...footwear?...loafers would be fine...boat shoes...uhhh...nope dont think so.
Your grooms men can wear SB blue blazers and matching slacks..white shirt and matching ties..its a classy look for a by the sea event and its an outfit you will wear again and again....my dos centavos


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

wnh and A. Clay-More, After reading your comments I have to wonder if either of you has actually read what I wrote. It certainly looks like both of you just saw my name and decided to attack. If you are serious and you did read what I said, please explain what you mean by your comments. Rather than simply attacking me, why don't you specifically address what I said if you think it is that bad?

I took the OP seriously, as did many others. I also told him that I thought his choice of footwear would look "costumey". I assume that you guys disagree with this assessment? At the same time I recognized that perhaps he was bound and determined to wear some type of casual shoe like this; therefore, rather than simply make fun of him I gave him another alternative that might not be as bad. I didn't recommend this as something I would do, but more as the lesser of two evils if that is what he was going to do despite the other advice he was being given.

And as for the suggestion that one should look at what I did and do the opposite, what does that mean. When I got married I wore a navy suit, white shirt, burgandy tie, and black captoe bals. I even posted a picture to show this. So what exactly is the "opposite" of what I did? Are you perhaps suggesting jeans and sneakers? What does the "opposite" mean here. Here is the picture again if you aren't capable of backing up and finding it on your own. Tell me specifically what I did wrong here. After all the suggestion was to do the "opposite" of what I did.

https://img231.imageshack.us/my.php?image=scan0023vq3.gif

Too often some folks seem to forget that giving someone advice is more than simply beating them over the head with what you think they should do or denigrating what they are doing. If you ask for directions to Detroit, it doesn't help you get to Detroit if all everyone does is tell you why they don't think you should go to Detroit. You want directions to Detroit. My approach is to both advise them to not go to Detroit but at the same time give them directions if that is where they are going to go.

I would really appreciate it if you two fellows would specifically refer to what I said (and not take it out of context) rather than simply making negative remarks about me personally. Neither of you know anything about me personally.

Cruiser


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## A. Clay-More (Dec 5, 2007)




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## Sartre (Mar 25, 2008)

In my opinion, the attitudes demonstrated in the latter half of this thread don't represent the best spirit of the trad forum.

Tjs


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## wnh (Nov 4, 2006)

Cruiser said:


> wnh and A. Clay-More, After reading your comments I have to wonder if either of you has actually read what I wrote.


I responded to the original poster suggesting that it would be a better idea to wear something nice and traditional rather than to go for some goofy boat-shoes-with-suit look. I then suggested that one would prefer to look back on pictures of the day and be pleased with how they looked rather than look back and think the whole thing was just ridiculous. You then countered with "Actually to many folks it is the fact that old pictures look silly that makes them fun to look at years later."

Your statement was true, granted. But it was also irrelevant. This is a forum dedicated entirely to men's clothing, specifically to dressing well. That doesn't involve wearing boat shoes with a suit, a sentiment you and I apparently share. So why offer a counterpoint to my argument, when you agree that the look would not be a good one? Seems like you were just doing it for the sake of petty argument.

Anyway, there's no point in continuing this. If you want to be offended, go ahead.


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

Still no one has told me if that shirt is trad. 

I think there is only one pair of boat shoes that will work here:

Unless of course the wedding is beach black tie, in which case you would need these

Either way, you'd probably be better off wearing blue blazers and white pants if you wanted to rock the boat shoe look. This wedding party looks fairly non-silly: 









Certainly better than these clowns in flip flops:


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

wnh said:


> Anyway, there's no point in continuing this. If you want to be offended, go ahead.


Actually it was you who was apparently offended and directed a reply to me.

Cruiser


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

Before this thread gets locked, does anyone want to put a wager on who is rubber and who is glue?


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## Quay (Mar 29, 2008)

Perhaps it's time for any debating gentlemen building any heat to go into the bar area of the club and have a drink.

"Malt does more than Milton can/ to justify God's ways to man." -- John Donne

Imagine then what scotch much less malt could do for a contrarian debate.

Cordially,
A.Q.


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

Quay said:


> Perhaps it's time for any debating gentlemen building any heat to go into the bar area of the club and have a drink.


I've got a better idea, and it's very, very trad:


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## Quay (Mar 29, 2008)

I must ask then: what does one wear to a duel?

Cordially,
A.Q.


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

Quay said:


> I must ask then: what does one wear to a duel?


https://img411.imageshack.us/my.php?image=340xww7.jpg

Cruiser


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## Quay (Mar 29, 2008)

^ Not quite my question but a nice picture nonetheless. That is what one wears to duel. I'd like to know what to wear to a duel.

Perhaps a sack blazer with Kevlar inserts just in case either side isn't a good shot? :icon_smile:

Cordially,
A.Q.


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## wnh (Nov 4, 2006)

videocrew said:


> Certainly better than these clowns in flip flops:


To be fair, at least you could easily get sand out of your flip flops. But if that's the reason, seems like you ought to just forgo the jackets, and maybe even the ties. Looks funny together like that.


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## e moneybags (Apr 23, 2008)

Well I take exception to being labeled a troll though when I originally told my buddy (a groomsmen) that for some further information on the subject he advised that I should consider wearing:


But I did not post with any intention other than to get some information on what kind of things would be considered fashionable/acceptable. That's how people learn things. When people post where I spend the majority of my interweb & time-wasting time (in mountain biking forums) about what kind of bike to buy or where to ride it is cause they are trying to gain some knowledge, not trying to be inflammatory. I asked cause I didn't know (though I had an idea). 

Anyway, I think it's funny to see that people can get in pi$$ing matches over clothes just as well as mtn bikes, politics, music, cars, and all else. 

I do appreciate the honest feedback that I got. 

I'm picking up the suit next week, and will have a variety of shoes to review and evaluate with the bride and get her thoughts. 

Still haven't ruled anything out.. :aportnoy:


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

e moneybags said:


> Well I take exception to being labeled a troll


You weren't. He was calling Cruiser a troll. Regardless of whether you agree with what he says, he is certainly one of the most divisive members of the forum, and many of the threads he posts in end up like this. I don't know if the problem is him, or how people respond to him, but that's the scoop. No need for you to be offended, you just didn't know the politics around these parts.

For the record, I'm still not a fan of the boat shoes look, especially with that suit, but once you've got it and see what it looks like, maybe you'll come to agree. Or not. Remember though, if your fiancee says it looks ridiculous, she's the one who is correct. Whether nor not you want to do it anyway is what the argument will really be about.


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## Orsini (Apr 24, 2007)

e moneybags said:


> Well I take exception to being labeled a troll...


I can assure you, that was not my intention. If my comments were interpreted as such, I apologize.


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

videocrew said:


> He was calling Cruiser a troll. Regardless of whether you agree with what he says, he is certainly one of the most divisive members of the forum, and many of the threads he posts in end up like this. I don't know if the problem is him, or how people respond to him, but that's the scoop.


I agree, it was me who was being called a troll. And I guess the problem is me. This thread is a good example of how divisive I am. After all, I did suggest to the OP that he NOT wear boat shows as that would be "costumey", and then I pointed out that I wore black captoe bals when I got married.

To be honest with you, I sort of thought that most would agree with me on not wearing boat shoes, and I certainly didn't know that my choice of a captoe was such a bad choice. I guess I was wrong by the way some jumped all over me though. Oh well, you live and learn.

Cruiser


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## e moneybags (Apr 23, 2008)

videocrew said:


> Remember though, if your fiancee says it looks ridiculous, she's the one who is correct. Whether nor not you want to do it anyway is what the argument will really be about.


YES. I have not forgotten this. She is a little whacky herself, so we'll see what happens.

Thanks again gang!
E


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## videocrew (Jun 25, 2007)

Cruiser said:


> I agree, it was me who was being called a troll. And I guess the problem is me. This thread is a good example of how divisive I am. After all, I did suggest to the OP that he NOT wear boat shows as that would be "costumey", and then I pointed out that I wore black captoe bals when I got married.
> 
> To be honest with you, I sort of thought that most would agree with me on not wearing boat shoes, and I certainly didn't know that my choice of a captoe was such a bad choice. I guess I was wrong by the way some jumped all over me though. Oh well, you live and learn.
> 
> Cruiser


I reread the thread, at great pain to myself, and lo and behold at least one member did call him a troll. This wasn't intended to be an attack on you Cruiser, the last thing I want after all is an e-enemy. To be fair, you didn't really start this whole thing, someone called him "Son of Cruiser" and you took the bait. I think this thread has been wrung of all it's productive value, but your initial advice was sound. What I meant was that it's a shame that most of the threads you post in turn into a round of 'attack Cruiser' followed by you defending yourself, etc. I haven't been around long enough to see what you did to garner so much animosity, hence my comment.

Besides, he learned the most important wedding lesson of all: "shut up and get out of the way." I'm currently entering the home stretch of the planning of my own wedding, and since my fiancee has made no effort to dress me in anything ridiculous, it has been relatively pain-free. I delivered my invite list when told to do so, called a friend to book the private room at his restaurant for the rehearsal dinner, expressed a preference on which cake was tastier when asked, and generally spoke when spoken to. Easy as can be!


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

videocrew said:


> This wasn't intended to be an attack on you Cruiser, the last thing I want after all is an e-enemy. To be fair, you didn't really start this whole thing, someone called him "Son of Cruiser" and you took the bait.


I appreciate your comments video, and I especially appreciate you taking the time to go back and re-read the thread. I've tried before to get folks to go back and re-read threads before they started piling on, but I think you are the first to actually do that. Thank you for that courtesy.

And you are right. I did take the bait. Someone else said the same thing in a private message. For that I am responsible.

Cruiser


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