# #TradProblems



## leisureclass (Jan 31, 2011)

- My Mercer OCBD takes twice as long to iron as the rest of my shirts

- While walking on a tile floor in suicide heeled gunboats I slipped and almost caused a scene

- Brooks Brothers doesn't understand me anymore

- All my favorite Men's shops closed before I was born


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## hardline_42 (Jan 20, 2010)

- Nylon watchbands with reinforced holes can't be easily slipped in behind springbars; holes with no reinforcing egg out too easily

- Know how to pronounce "Hebrides"; laughed at by fashion forumites when trying to pronouncing "Zegna"

- Drive Volvo 240 wagon for it's traditional lines and overall stoutness; find "Dukakis '88" sticker plastered on bumper by local ne'er-do-wells.


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## Trad-ish (Feb 19, 2011)

-The closest BB is three hours away.


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## Reptilicus (Dec 14, 2004)

-Wool blended with nylon "for strength".


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## blue suede shoes (Mar 22, 2010)

Volvo was purchased by the Chinese and Saab is out of business.


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## jt2gt (Jun 23, 2011)

After 15 pairs of buying, returning and reselling Aldens, I still haven't figured out my size.

To cuff or not to cuff?

Why can't I get my shell cordovan to shine like Macs?


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## Brooksfan (Jan 25, 2005)

The phone company refuses to fix my rotary dial phone. 

My 8-track tape player is jammed and no one will work on it. 

I can't find VCR tapes anywhere. 

The sack suit and sport coat jacket that Mr. Flusser derided in his books of the 80's because it was so boxy and full that it made you look heavier is now apparently supposed to look like it got shrunk by the cleaners. 

Ties, lapels, and collars are too small and I'm too big. 

Other than that, no complaints.


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## benjclark (Mar 14, 2012)

-- Too many tweed choices made me late to the office.


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

My wife found out I knocked up the lawn man's daughter.


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

Regardless of how much we pay for our chinos, the pocket edges and hems/cuffs are going to fray...way too soon in our estimation! 
Food stains are attracted only to our favored ties/jackets/etc.


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## Topsider (Jul 9, 2005)

I'm not "dressed up," dammit.


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## danielm (May 2, 2012)

Global warming - it's cutting short tweed season!


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## Acacian (Jul 10, 2007)

The lingering fear that I may not outlive the last hippie.


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## Pentheos (Jun 30, 2008)

Shell or not shell?


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## firedancer (Jan 11, 2011)

How do I explain to my ESl dry cleaner what a 3 roll 2 is?


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## catside (Oct 7, 2010)

I am nostalgic for times I have never lived.


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## rl1856 (Jun 7, 2005)

I can no longer find tubes to keep my tv running. 

I fear my tweeds may outlive me, but my son will not want them when I am gone.

My 1980 Diesel Mercedes has become trendy, and I now have young people asking if I use something called "biodiesel". 

The new help speaks a different language. 

Baseball hasn't been the same since the Dodgers and Giants moved west. 

Best, Ross


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

firedancer said:


> How do I explain to my ESl dry cleaner what a 3 roll 2 is?


LOL...or even worse, what can you do with a Dry Cleaning establishment that cleaned and pressed your 3R2 Sack Blazer properly on a sufficient number of occasions to fully earn your trust and then screws it up by resetting the lapels during the most recent pressing(!)? :crazy:


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## Jack1425 (Sep 19, 2008)

eagle2250 said:


> LOL...or even worse, what can you do with a Dry Cleaning establishment that cleaned and pressed your 3R2 Sack Blazer properly on a sufficient number of occasions to fully earn your trust and then screws it up by resetting the lapels during the most recent pressing(!)? :crazy:


This may just be the best one yet! And a source of greater anxiety than entering a war zone!! :icon_headagainstwal


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

Acacian said:


> The lingering fear that I may not outlive the last hippie.


Alas, only the good die young!!


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## hookem12387 (Dec 29, 2009)

leisureclass said:


> - All my favorite Men's shops closed before I was born


 Brilliant


danielm said:


> Global warming - it's cutting short tweed season!


Houston, there is no tweed season.



catside said:


> I am nostalgic for times I have never lived.


True life, the story of the under-40 trad

More of a forum problem: My office's restroom doesn't have a full length mirror.


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## drlivingston (Jun 21, 2012)

-Too overweight to look good in flat-front pants
-Moths seem to have impeccable taste in clothing
-My dry cleaner took it upon themself to "flatten" the rolled edges of some of my ties.


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## Trevor (Oct 20, 2011)

catside said:


> I am nostalgic for times I have never lived.


You can say that again!


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## Doctor Damage (Feb 18, 2005)

hookem12387 said:


> leisureclass said:
> 
> 
> > - All my favorite Men's shops closed before I was born
> ...


Seconded.


danielm said:


> Global warming - it's cutting short tweed season!


The US weather service announced today that they predict a record warm and dry winter this year. That's not good news for famers, or anyone who enjoys winter: I have too many good winter coats to see this as good news.


hookem12387 said:


> More of a forum problem: My office's restroom doesn't have a full length mirror.


That's more a problem for the weirdos on Styleforum, than AAAC!


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## oxford cloth button down (Jan 1, 2012)

Everywhere I work people think that I am dressed up in chinos and and OCBD.

By the time I in my life when I have Brooks Brothers and J.Press money they will no longer sell what I want.

If I am not surrounded by black square toe shoes or black pants, it is vibrantly colored dress shirts.


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## leisureclass (Jan 31, 2011)

oxford cloth button down said:


> By the time I in my life when I have Brooks Brothers and J.Press money they will no longer sell what I want.


Ha! This might be my favorite one yet


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## danielm (May 2, 2012)

Doctor Damage said:


> Seconded.
> 
> The US weather service announced today that they predict a record warm and dry winter this year. That's not good news for famers, or anyone who enjoys winter: I have too many good winter coats to see this as good news.
> 
> That's more a problem for the weirdos on Styleforum, than AAAC!


Being a heavy set fellow, my winter wardrobe is much more complementary than summer. I've seriously contemplated moving further north just so I can wear my tradly cold weather clothing more.

The wife said no.


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## Trip English (Dec 22, 2008)

My wife wants me to act my age. Because I'm acting my grandfather's age.


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## Hardiw1 (May 17, 2011)

Damn, one more inch ______ in the _______.


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## Beresford (Mar 30, 2006)

The local Bass outlet went out of business.


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## AlfaNovember (Jun 27, 2011)

Brooksfan said:


> The phone company refuses to fix my rotary dial phone.


Sure they will. Just listen to the automated menu, which has recently changed, and then press "six" for the service department.


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## Youthful Repp-robate (Sep 26, 2011)

My GF's neighbors think that she's carrying on an inappropriate relationship with one of her professors.


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## hardline_42 (Jan 20, 2010)

Youthful Repp-robate said:


> My GF's neighbors think that she's carrying on an inappropriate relationship with one of her professors.


Haha! My fav so far.


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## phyrpowr (Aug 30, 2009)

Whatever mine were they just went away: the nice dermatology man wrote and said the ugly thing on my shoulder was *BENIGN!!:icon_cheers:

*Don't worry though, I'll have another complaint tomorrow; probably something to do with caps in restaurants


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## Youthful Repp-robate (Sep 26, 2011)

hardline_42 said:


> Haha! My fav so far.


Thanks. If only it weren't true...

Phyrpowr:

_That's_ some good news.


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## LouB (Nov 8, 2010)

Vibrantly colored AND untucked, with the black pants pooling around the square-toed shoes, merrily rubbing on the sidewalk...



oxford cloth button down said:


> Everywhere I work people think that I am dressed up in chinos and and OCBD.
> 
> By the time I in my life when I have Brooks Brothers and J.Press money they will no longer sell what I want.
> 
> If I am not surrounded by black square toe shoes or black pants, it is vibrantly colored dress shirts.


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## Patrick06790 (Apr 10, 2005)

I had the choice today of buying a fly-fishing pack and a really nice knit tie. I chose the former. It was close.


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## 32rollandrock (May 1, 2008)

I wish I could reply to this, but a vacuum tube just went haywire.


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## L-feld (Dec 3, 2011)

Paralegal: Hahaha, did you, Chris, Jeremy and Roddy coordinate your suits this morning?

Me: What do you mean?

Paralegal: You're all wearing the same suit, didn't you notice?

Me: Oh, right. No, it's Seersucker Thursday

Paralegal: What-sucker?


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## Hobson (Mar 13, 2007)

Nearly everything I desire is difficult to acquire. Some things are impossible. Perhaps that is why I treasure them.


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## Youthful Repp-robate (Sep 26, 2011)

People keep telling me I look like an astronaut, or at least a character from "October Sky."


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## filfoster (Aug 23, 2011)

Acacian said:


> The lingering fear that I may not outlive the last hippie.


It IS a worthy goal. We must try.


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## Bandit44 (Oct 1, 2010)

When shopping ebay for sport jackets, adding the word(s) "trad," "ivy," or "Mad Men" automatically doubles the asking price.

Edit: The Exchange being a delightful exception.


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## Balfour (Mar 23, 2012)

L-feld said:


> Paralegal: Hahaha, did you, Chris, Jeremy and Roddy coordinate your suits this morning?
> 
> Me: What do you mean?
> 
> ...


LOL. Seersucker is unfortunately not an option over here.

Not sure this is a trad problem, but a real life conversation:

Work colleague: Hey, your tie's wonky.

Balfour: I'm sorry?

Work colleague: Your tie's wonky. [pointing]

Balfour: That's a dimple.


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## The Rambler (Feb 18, 2010)

A free-flowing stream of comments from SWMBO, most recently (after the 3d debate): "1965 called. They want their clothes back."


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## Fashion Frank (Jul 14, 2012)

Every musical artist I like is dead .

Every president I like is dead.

Every suit I like is out of date.

Every car I like is no longer made.

Every style of womans hair and clothes I like is out of date .

I could go on but I think you get the drift .

All the Best , Fashion Frank


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## eyedoc2180 (Nov 19, 2006)

A pretty girl made fun of my wingtips. Hmmmmph.


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## arkirshner (May 10, 2005)

eyedoc2180 said:


> A pretty girl made fun of my wingtips. Hmmmmph.


At least you got her attention.


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## Billax (Sep 26, 2011)

eyedoc2180 said:


> A pretty girl made fun of my wingtips. Hmmmmph.


eyedoc, that begs the question. Almost certainly, your wingtips complemented the rest of your rig. Was it more important to be complimented by a callow ditz?


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## wrwhiteknight (Mar 20, 2012)

I didn't even know I liked trad until I read this thread; I thought _you _guys were the hippies. (seriously)


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## Barnavelt (Jul 31, 2012)

I don't get caught checking out young ladies; I get caught checking out 80 year old men and wondering where they buy their sweaters.


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## eyedoc2180 (Nov 19, 2006)

arkirshner said:


> At least you got her attention.


Trouble is, in her mind, the attention was only due to the wingtips!


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## eyedoc2180 (Nov 19, 2006)

Billax said:


> eyedoc, that begs the question. Almost certainly, your wingtips complemented the rest of your rig. Was it more important to be complimented by a callow ditz?


Complementing my response above, she was indeed callow and a ditz. However, those were not the features that had my attention, if you get my drift. As for importance, I cannot say.


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## P Hudson (Jul 19, 2008)

Barnavelt said:


> I don't get caught checking out young ladies; I get caught checking out 80 year old men and wondering where they buy their sweaters.


Exactly! Well, I'm not sure I ever "get caught", but I know exactly what you mean.


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

Billax said:


> eyedoc, that begs the question. Almost certainly, your wingtips complemented the rest of your rig. Was it more important to be complimented by a callow ditz?





eyedoc2180 said:


> Complementing my response above, she was indeed callow and a ditz. However, those were not the features that had my attention, if you get my drift. As for importance, I cannot say.


I think eyedoc is saying that the proper response to member Billax's question depends almost entirely on the brevity of the skirt hem and the height of the heels worn by that "callow ditz!" Truth be known , methinks eyedoc makes a good point.


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## eyedoc2180 (Nov 19, 2006)

eagle2250 said:


> I think eyedoc is saying that the proper response to member Billax's question depends almost entirely on the brevity of the skirt hem and the height of the heels worn by that "callow ditz!" Truth be known , methinks eyedoc makes a good point.


Well struck, Sir!


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