# What's the Difference Between a Cadillac and a Golf Ball?



## Brooksfan (Jan 25, 2005)

Tiger can drive a golf ball 300 yards


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

Just a detour down John Daly road!!


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

Rumor has it that Tiger is not the only one in the family, who can swing a mean golf club! Can anyone explain why his wife had to break out three windows of his Escalade to reach in and unlock the door lock?


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## young guy (Jan 6, 2005)

eagle2250 said:


> Rumor has it that Tiger is not the only one in the family, who can swing a mean golf club! Can anyone explain why his wife had to break out three windows of his Escalade to reach in and unlock the door lock?


are you sure she was aiming for the windows?


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## Intrepid (Feb 20, 2005)

January issue of GOLF magazine isn't out yet. However, the cover has a picture of Obama and Tiger, and the cover says that the issue contains 10 tips that Tiger has for Obama.

We can only guess what they are, but maybe:

>Never take advice from a Vice President, or a caddie. If they were very bright, they wouldn't be carrying the bag.

>That health care water hazard that you have gotten yourself into looks like it is unplayable. Maybe better to take a mulligan, and go to the next hole.

etc.


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

3. Scandanavian women may be crazy in the sack, but they are crazy everywhere else too!!


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

Tiger has had so many problems with women lately.


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## Relayer (Nov 9, 2005)

The police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him... she said "I don't know exactly.... but put me down for a 5."


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## harvey_birdman (Mar 10, 2008)

A Cadillac is an overpriced, underpowered, poorly designed, ostentatious automobile. A golf ball is a piece of sporting equipment used in the game of golf.


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

Relayer said:


> The police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him... she said "I don't know exactly.... but put me down for a 5."


Does his wife have Alzhymer's? And she doesn't know how many times she hit him?


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

harvey_birdman said:


> A Cadillac is an overpriced, underpowered, poorly designed, ostentatious automobile. A golf ball is a piece of sporting equipment used in the game of golf.


Wow. You must be a laugh a minute at cocktail parties.


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

And now the Daily News claims he has 6 more women in his life with whom he cheated on Elin Nordengren.


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## archduke (Nov 21, 2003)

a golf ball lasts 3 times as long and is better engineered?


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

The Cadillac has a larger sweet spot and rather than leaving the golfer to be satisfied with just a "hole-in-one", the Cadillac allows the golfer to achieve two, three and yes, even four or more holes in one, without the golfer ever having to change clubs!


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## ksinc (May 30, 2005)

Lots of people play golf balls that someone else drove into a lake?


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## Henry346 (Oct 31, 2009)

archduke said:


> a golf ball lasts 3 times as long and is better engineered?


But not much could compare with the masterpiece that is a golf ball in this sense...


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## Intrepid (Feb 20, 2005)

As we eagerly await the January issue of Golf Digest to see what tips Tiger has for Obama, maybe it would be reasonable to guess that one certain entry will be:

>Never chase women that have 8 X 10 glossy photos of themselves.


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## Andy (Aug 25, 2002)

My big disappointment with Tiger is that he wasn't driving a Buick! Where is his advertising spokesman loyalty. :icon_smile_big:

On second thought that may be his flaw - loyalty (or lack thereof)!


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## Brooksfan (Jan 25, 2005)

Andy said:


> My big disappointment with Tiger is that he wasn't driving a Buick! Where is his advertising spokesman loyalty. :icon_smile_big:
> 
> On second thought that may be his flaw - loyalty (or lack thereof)!


Actually Tiger and Buick parted ways back at the end of 2007 or early 2008 when GM still had a chance to survive as a viable company. They realized the $7 million they were paying Tiger wasn't bringing in younger buyers and he didn't argue.

I'm thinking a few other companies for whom he endorses products will either end or curtail their relationships going forward. However, I think Nike will stay with him.

I can see the posters already. Just Do It. 
Just Do It. 
Just Do It. 
Just Do It. 
Just Do It. 
Just Do It. 
Just Do It. ....


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

Intrepid said:


> As we eagerly await the January issue of Golf Digest to see what tips Tiger has for Obama, maybe it would be reasonable to guess that one certain entry will be:
> 
> >Never chase women that have 8 X 10 glossy photos of themselves.


Not if they're sexually explicit?


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## brokencycle (Jan 11, 2008)

Andy said:


> My big disappointment with Tiger is that he wasn't driving a Buick! Where is his advertising spokesman loyalty. :icon_smile_big:
> 
> On second thought that may be his flaw - loyalty (or lack thereof)!


GM dropped him awhile ago. But Cadillac and Buick are both GM makes.


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## DCLawyer68 (Jun 1, 2009)

> GM dropped him awhile ago. But Cadillac and Buick are both GM makes.


If by "dropped him" you mean "couldn't afford him" that's the case.

Perhaps he'd be perfect to return though.

"You know, we could all use a second chance, which is why I invite you to drive a new LaCrosse."


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

Tiger's stock has greatly diminished.

How can anyone that values diversity, hire a spokesman who's entire Harem displays no diversity whatsoever?? 

ic12337:


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

On the upside, every one of the girls he is being linked to are DIMES.

If you are going to go out, might as well be in a blaze of glory (and hot women)


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## Jae iLL (Nov 14, 2009)

Its crazy how the media goes through so much effort to get the scoop on the tiger woods story as if it's actually news or something


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## brokencycle (Jan 11, 2008)

mrkleen said:


> On the upside, every one of the girls he is being linked to are DIMES.
> 
> If you are going to go out, might as well be in a blaze of glory (and hot women)


The radio station I listen to has a morning show, where they speculate that after being married to a supermodel, he needed to get with more average looking women.


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

brokencycle said:


> The radio station I listen to has a morning show, where they speculate that after being married to a supermodel, he needed to get with more average looking women.


I think everyone of the women he is linked to is just as hot, if not hotter than his wife.

His wife looks like she never smiles. No wonder the guy is looking for fun elsewhere.


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

mrkleen said:


> I think everyone of the women he is linked to is just as hot, if not hotter than his wife.
> 
> His wife looks like she never smiles. No wonder the guy is looking for fun elsewhere.


He just needed to score a hole in one!


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## Relayer (Nov 9, 2005)

mrkleen said:


> I think everyone of the women he is linked to is *just as hot, if not hotter than his wife.*


Uhhh... no.










Although, personally I love a woman who, in two shakes, can whip up a great breakfast and serve it with a smile.


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

Relayer said:


> Uhhh... no.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Mindy Lawton is hot,I'd date her.


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

Relayer said:


> Uhhh... no.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Maybe not ALL of them...but:


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

mrkleen said:


> Maybe not ALL of them...but:


Trashy looking broads like this scare me.

I think she could beat me up!!


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

Relayer said:


> Uhhh... no.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


This one is rather wholesome looking.

Maybe we could touch up the nose a little...


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

mrkleen said:


> Maybe not ALL of them...but:


Good Lord,Rachel looks she can beat a guy up and then tie them up!


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

WouldaShoulda said:


> Trashy looking broads like this scare me.
> 
> I think she could beat me up!!


Thats fine, if you cant take the heat - stay out of the kitchen.


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

mrkleen said:


> Maybe not ALL of them...but:


LOL...Miss Rachel's fake eyelashes seem to be overpowering her right eyelid. One can only wonder what else may be fake?


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

eagle2250 said:


> LOL...Miss Rachel's fake eyelashes seem to be overpowering her right eyelid. One can only wonder what else may be fake?


You see a woman that looks like that and you are worried about her eyelashes?

Wow.


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

mrkleen said:


> You see a woman that looks like that and you are worried about her eyelashes?
> 
> Wow.


True.

I'd worry more about the STDs!!


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

WouldaShoulda said:


> True.
> 
> I'd worry more about the STDs!!


They have these new things called condoms....you should check them out, they allow you to bed hot women - and not worry about things like that.

Seem to be pretty reliable too.


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## young guy (Jan 6, 2005)

mrkleen said:


> They have these new things called condoms....you should check them out, they allow you to bed hot women - and not worry about things like that.
> 
> Seem to be pretty reliable too.


yeah but the pope says not to use them


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

mrkleen said:


> They have these new things called condoms....you should check them out, they allow you to bed hot women - and not worry about things like that.
> 
> Seem to be pretty reliable too.


I wouldn't even tap that Ho with your dick!!

I'd be affraid if she sneezed near me!!


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

WouldaShoulda said:


> I wouldn't even tap that Ho with your dick!!
> 
> I'd be affraid if she sneezed near me!!


Some of you guys live in a very sheltered world.

Should have saved this for Styleforum....lol.


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

mrkleen said:


> Some of you guys live in a very sheltered world.


...by the GALLON!!


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## young guy (Jan 6, 2005)

WouldaShoulda said:


> ...by the GALLON!!


should anyone wonder why gay people exist - see above ad - LOL


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

Helpful WS - and very up to date as well. 

I see you have your pulse on the world of the modern relationship


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

mrkleen said:


> Helpful WS - and very up to date as well.
> 
> I see you have your pulse on the world of the modern relationship


Promiscuity is "modern??"

Who Knew!!


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

WouldaShoulda said:


> Promiscuity is "modern??"
> 
> Who Knew!!


We're we talking about promiscuity, or your fear of hot women?

I am confused.


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

mrkleen said:


> We're we talking about promiscuity, or your fear of hot women?
> 
> I am confused.


Sorry,

Diseased stripper chic is not "hot" in my book!!


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

eagle2250 said:


> LOL...Miss Rachel's fake eyelashes seem to be overpowering her right eyelid. One can only wonder what else may be fake?


Her boobs?


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

mrkleen said:


> They have these new things called condoms....you should check them out, they allow you to bed hot women - and not worry about things like that.
> 
> Seem to be pretty reliable too.


not all condoms are reliable.


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

Howard said:


> not all condoms are reliable.


Thanks for the heads up


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## Intrepid (Feb 20, 2005)

I had forgotten about the Lysol ads.

What a great endorsement opportunity, to rival Nike, etc.

The woods family gathered around a roaring fire place with Mrs Woods caption reading something like:

" Thanks to Lysol for a great douche that saved my marriage. Thanks to Lysol!"

Brilliant idea!


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## WouldaShoulda (Aug 5, 2009)

Intrepid said:


> The woods family gathered around a roaring fire place with Mrs Woods caption reading something like:
> 
> " Thanks to Lysol for a great douche that saved my marriage. Thanks to Lysol!"
> 
> Brilliant idea!


Only it appears Tiger prefers the skankiness!! :crazy:


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## mrkleen (Sep 21, 2007)

WouldaShoulda said:


> Only it appears Tiger prefers the skankiness!! :crazy:


These are MISTRESSES - not people he is settling down with.

Who would you rather go to Vegas with for the weekend - some housewife, or a hot girl that is into threesomes?

Then again, dont answer - your experience is clearly lacking on this subject.


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## Brooksfan (Jan 25, 2005)

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas until you spread it to your wife.


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## Intrepid (Feb 20, 2005)

Brooksfan said:


> What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas until you spread it to your wife.


As Jim Bouton said in his book "Ball Four", "the most difficult part of playing baseball in the major leagues is explaining to our wife why SHE has to get a penicillin, because YOU have a kidney infection."


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## Howard (Dec 7, 2004)

mrkleen said:


> These are MISTRESSES - not people he is settling down with.
> 
> Who would you rather go to Vegas with for the weekend - some housewife, or a hot girl that is into threesomes?
> 
> Then again, dont answer - your experience is clearly lacking on this subject.


A girl that's into threesomes.


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