# Nervous Flyer



## Karl89 (Feb 20, 2005)

Gents,

Some thoughts would be welcome on this situation. I am 35 and have been traveling by plane since I was a baby. I have probably close to a million miles flown and although I dont travel 150 days of the year like I did 6 or 7 years ago for work, I still manage between 50-60 flights a year.

The problem is that I have become a bit of a nervous flyer. I had a bad flight from London (even the fligh attendants had ghastky looks on their faces) a few years ago and ever since then turbulence tends to make me a bit nervous. If the flight is smooth I am fine and whatever you wish to call my current dilema hasn't caused me any real harm in my career or personal life but I'd rather be able to be a bit more calm on a bumpy flight.

I understand the physics of flight and how safe it is but still for some reason turbulence turns me into a white knuckle flyer and gets my heart rate up - I dont have any other such fears/phobias what have you in any other aspect of my life - well I tend to be overcome with dread when the Mets send in their middle relief guys during a tight game.

My dad who was a road warrior in his younger days has told me that he went through a similar stage in his late 30s and he just grew out of it.

So any thoughts, insights, advice? I have a number of flights this summer and would hope that will be a bit more relaxing than they have been of late.

Karl


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## radix023 (May 3, 2007)

I don't have personal experience, but I'd say block it out or distract yourself:

sleeping blindfold
music player and headset
book
video device (be it laptop, or portable DVD player)

not sure this is of any use...


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## Cary Grant (Sep 11, 2008)

Karl-

While not as heavy a flyer as you once were, I was doing 20-30 flights for a stretch and had no problems. Then, like you, I had one bad flight coming back from Europe- the flight was via Amsterdam and as we flew over Greenland, for 20 minutes we experienced turbulence out of a hollywood film. Glasses flying, bins popping open... at what point the pilot on the mic swearing (four letter words and all) at everybody to stay seated like "their life depended on it" etc.

I really thought we were done.

For the next year the slightest turb got me nervous. But you know? 5 years later and many many miles I'm OK.

I'd just accept it: a crappy flight. You got scared. It's OK. Consider yourself having "missed the big one" and it will be smooth flying from here on out.


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## Quay (Mar 29, 2008)

Valium, Xanax, etc., would all be useful in the short term. Most physicians will prescribe a trial dose to see if it helps.

Several airlines also used to recommend places that would school you over any fears of flying. You sound like you've probably maintained an elite level at at least one airline and I'd think to call the special number see what they would recommend. A colleague of mine recently got good advice from the Medallion folks at Delta for a similar problem. (Of course they are not probably altruistic and simply want to keep their customers, but they do seem to send people onto things that actually work!)


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## Cruiser (Jul 21, 2006)

Karl89 said:


> The problem is that I have become a bit of a nervous flyer. I had a bad flight from London (even the fligh attendants had ghastky looks on their faces) a few years ago and ever since then turbulence tends to make me a bit nervous.


Back in 1969 I flew from San Diego CA to Jacksonville FL on a U.S. Navy C-47 (DC-3) during which we skirted some really severe weather across the Southeastern United States. We were bouncing around like ping pong balls with stuff flying all around. At one point I happened to notice that the co-pilot had come into the rear of the aircraft and was playing poker with some of the guys, so I asked if I could go up front. They said OK so I went up and sat in the co-pilot's seat for awhile.

What struck me was how totally unconcerned the pilot was over the turbulance. It was no big deal to him. We just bounced along like it was nothing.

My conclusion from this was that turbulance that non-aviators get excited over is something that pilots think nothing about. The aircraft is perfectly capable of handling it and they know what they are doing; therefore, unless it is making you sick to your stomach, it's nothing to worry about. Perhaps this has been a false sense of security, but it has worked for me over the years. It was especially helpful to me when I later became a military aircrewmember myself.

Cruiser


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## Canadian (Jan 17, 2008)

I do recall two things:

As a younger passenger (early 20s), I remember WestJet boarding a nervous older lady first, gently calming her and getting her a glass of wine during pre-boarding. That particular lady was burying a close relative and had not flown before, but the urgency of the funeral required her to travel by air. WestJet stewards seemed to be prepared for nervous passengers and I am impressed. My cousin works for Westjet, and she claims they have excellent service in that field.

Secondly, unlike driving an automobile, airlines encourage you to go to an airport bar or to buy drinks onboard the aircraft. While I am actually more nervous about dying in an automobile crash, as I log hundreds of kilometers every week in my work, I am more than content to board an aircraft, barely able to function and in a stupor. I'm not talking about getting abusively drunk or if you are a particularly mean drunk, this may not be wise, but once aboard, I have been known to order 2-3 drinks, in addition to the 2-3 consumed before boarding.

YMMV. I know some people prefer sedatives to alcohol. Both are depressants so it may work okay for you.

Thomas


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## Miket61 (Mar 1, 2008)

I was on a flight into Burlington Vermont on a fifty-seater, forty eight of which were filled with a high school gospel choir on their first flight.

We went through a snowstorm - the plane bounced around like a rollercoaster. The experience was not helped by the screaming high school students. Half screamed because they thought they were going to die, the other half thought it was the most fun experience they'd ever had in their lives.

Personally, I make a point to sit upright, facing forward, my hands clasped in my lap during takeoff and landing, but the rest of the flight I'm fine. Plane crashes are extremely rare, and they almost never fall out of the sky in the middle of a flight.


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## Karl89 (Feb 20, 2005)

Gents,

Thanks for the suggestions. Although I am 99% fine during the flight, there are some moment of extreme anxiousness.

I have thought of contacting both the airlines to see what program they have and our company pilot, an ex Delta guy, to have lunch and just give me his thoughts from a professional's perspective.

Stastically my fear is ridiculous but as I anticipate that I will have to travel more in the coming year than I have in the recent past I'd rather see if I can become more comfortable with a bumpy flight.

Thanks,

Karl


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## eagle2250 (Mar 24, 2006)

^^While what I am about to type may come off sounding trite, perhaps fatalistic, it is not intended as such. It was a piece of advice I was offered, very early in my military service by a grizzled, battle scared old veteran; "we are all going to die some time and probably not have any say in when it happens." Don't worry about something you cannot control. Over the years, when the proverbial "sh*t" hit the fan, I've simply offered up a quick prayer and then focused on the job at hand...it works! I'm still here...wahoo!  May you enjoy calm skies on your summer travels.


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## JerseyJohn (Oct 26, 2007)

To add to Eagle's response, I always tell myself "the pilot's going to get it right because it's his a$$, too!" :icon_smile_big: 

When my wife flies, she likes Ativan (lorazepam), which is an anti-anxiety drug. It's not side-effect free, though, and you need to heed the usual warnings about driving or operating heavy machinery that come with all medications of this sort. It also seems to take a while to kick in, so it's best taken about a half hour before the flight. It doesn't completely blunt nervousness; it just stops it from escalating.


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## Pitt 84 (Feb 22, 2009)

*Time will settle your problem...*

For roughly 22 years I was in the air at least 3 or 4 times a week. I had a similar situation...small plane, bad storm, turned back, & a rough landing. Much as you, I developed a sensitivity, I discussed it with my rabbi. He replied that many flyers get caught in this and it was basically a timing/physical thing...and rather than resorting to drugs try to last it out.

It waned over time as he said it would, but it seems I have a better _understanding _of the ups & downs of flights these days...


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## Bartolo (Mar 2, 2009)

Have you made progress with this?

The "white knuckled fliers" I know were VERY happy when they finally talked to a doctor about it, and switched from alcohol (a very poor anti-anxiety agent) to a prescription anxiolytic (anti-anxiety drug). Many times, the drugs can be omitted entirely after a few flights. In short, you need not address this alone, and a small dose of a prescription drug can help a LOT. Good luck!


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## The Gabba Goul (Feb 11, 2005)

I do a pretty good amount of flying, and the funny thing is that turbulence doesnt really bother me so much as claustrophobia...if I have to sit on a plane for more than about 5 hours, I start to really get uncomfortable. 

Probably not the answer you wanna hear, but It never seems to get any better no matter how many times I travel, I find ativan is almost a necessity for long flights.


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## CPVS (Jul 17, 2005)

Canadian said:


> Secondly, unlike driving an automobile, airlines encourage you to go to an airport bar or to buy drinks onboard the aircraft. While I am actually more nervous about dying in an automobile crash, as I log hundreds of kilometers every week in my work, I am more than content to board an aircraft, barely able to function and in a stupor. I'm not talking about getting abusively drunk or if you are a particularly mean drunk, this may not be wise, but once aboard, I have been known to order 2-3 drinks, in addition to the 2-3 consumed before boarding.
> 
> YMMV. I know some people prefer sedatives to alcohol. Both are depressants so it may work okay for you.
> 
> Thomas


It's a very delicate line you're approaching, I'm afraid.

While alcohol is permitted both before and in flight, there are strict laws in the United States, Canada, the UK, the EU, and elsewhere concerning incapacitation from alcohol or other substances. If a passenger appears to be under undue influence before flight, he will be denied boarding. If a passenger becomes intoxicated while in flight, various measures are open to the cabin attendants.

Remember that cabin attendants exist primarily for passenger safety, and their commands MUST be followed on pain of criminal and/or civil prosecution.

Why this concern about drunkenness and flying by the airlines and regulators? It's not prudishness. It's not a fear that you will leave the plane and drive drunk. It's because: (a) In an incapacitated state, people are more likely to cause disturbances which may affect their safety or the safety of others; and (b), in the event of an emergency, it is NOT safe to have intoxicated or otherwise incapacitated persons aboard an aircraft. Not only is there a chance that someone in such a condition could not survive an evacuation, that person might make it difficult for others to evacuate (e.g., by stumbling in the aisle).

I merely mention these things. As always, the rule is enjoy in moderation.


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## Canadian (Jan 17, 2008)

CPVS,

You are entirely correct. I have a very good tolerance for alcohol, and it generally makes me sleepy, not agressive if I have too much. I also take prescription drugs for some other unrelated condition, and my doctor has suggested that I avoid mixing in anti-anxiety agents, while a margurita is probably okay. 

Of course, drinking too much on an airplane is possible, and many flight attendants will realize they have a responsibility to cut somebody off if they're agressive or over the line. They're not professional bartenders, but on my favorite airline, they are very professional about it (try seeing a flight filled with 16 year old kids who think they can get booze because they're over Canada). 

I suppose the real danger exists (in my mind) where somebody takes any substance, drug or alcohol, where they start losing capacity. Atavain delivered sublingually has a devestating effect on me, and my parents used it liberally to get me through some troubles. I prefer to avoid it, especially if there's a chance of mixing with my sleeping pills several hours after arrival.

The reason I compared it to driving an automobile is simply, no pilot or patrolman would offer you a shot of whiskey to settle you down if you are upset and driving. In Canada, especially on the local airlines, people with a fear of flying are often asked if they want a drink. And because they are responsible adults, they usually have the capacity to say, yes, or no, depending on their ability to control themselves. I would never suggest somebody attempt to board an aircraft while actually intoxicated, nor should one treat First Class as an excuse to get wasted and see how many shots one can down.

My cousin works for WestJet. One of the best parts of her job is helping passengers off the plane if they require mobility assistance (ie walkers or wheelchairs). She has dozens of terrific stories and 99.5% of the people on the planes are reasonable and controllable. 

If you suffer from serious anxiety, consider all your options. Sometimes, talking it over with a therapist, a wife or friend is better than any cocktail of drugs. I was scared the first time I was on a plane, but my dad told me everything that was going to happen and I made it through just fine. 

Thomas


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## Joe Frances (Sep 1, 2004)

Karl89 said:


> Gents,
> 
> Some thoughts would be welcome on this situation. I am 35 and have been traveling by plane since I was a baby. I have probably close to a million miles flown and although I dont travel 150 days of the year like I did 6 or 7 years ago for work, I still manage between 50-60 flights a year.
> 
> ...


Karl I am almost exactly the same as you are, except thankfully I don't travel as much as I used to. The best thing is to wear Bose noise canceling headphones and listen to music or talk that really interests you. This has helped me not only with turbulence but also the tiresome nature of the endless drone of air travel. I am less tired on a good flight, and not as distressed if there's turbulence.

I think some of my anxiety with turbulence is anticipation of turbulence, especially when the pilot says there are thunderstorms in the area and tells the flight attendants to take their seats. I am then geared to be nervous. So the anxiety of anticipating makes it worse. I would also say, at least for me, the better option is NOT to drink any alcohol on or before the flight. I find being a bit woozy makes the bumps worse. Additionally, I like to fly United Air Lines because you can listen to air traffic control, and listening to the pilots talk about finding clearer air in a calm voice makes me feel better. I sort of know what's going on, and can sense that a competent crew is trying to sort things out. I find that reassuring. This is probably a very personal thing, and others will feel exactly the opposite, but I like to listen to ATC.

Final note, I know that my aversion to flying and my anxiety are related as much to anticipation as anything else, because some turbulence (light to moderate as they say) as we are within a half hour of landing does not bother me. I know we are close to getting off, and I can deal with it. It's the early in the flight or mid-flight bumps that bother me the most.

Thanks for this great topic, I think there are a lot of us who go up there for work who feel this way.


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## Preu Pummel (Feb 5, 2008)

I recommend getting to know God and be at peace with the idea of death.

You could easily die crossing the road, driving, slipping in the bath tub, or choking on food in private. Death by plane is very rare, but you should just accept you'll die some day. It helps me carry a relaxed, carefree attitude when planes get crazy in the air.


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## Karl89 (Feb 20, 2005)

Gents,

Well sumer flying has been a mixed bag. Some bumpy flights, a diversion (due to weather and low fuel) and a few nervous moments.

And this is purely from my experience but I find myself far more comfortable even in turbulence if the aircraft is a 737 or A320 or larger. The Bombardier C900 (which Delta and Northwest use alot) and the Embraer E70 (US Airways seems to only use these in Dallas) seem to get tossed around far more than I like.

But this summer at least most of my stress as come from having to navigate airports - Philiadelphia's airport is positively third world and Cincy might be ok to connect through but security is an hour long nightmare.

To be continued.....

Karl


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## Pentheos (Jun 30, 2008)

Man up. And scotch.


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