The Southern Preppy Bro


Active Member with Corp. Privileges
It's an old article. I hope I don't offend anyone.

The Southern Preppy Bro.

It's game day. As you walk to the tailgate you get some weird looks from the opposing team's fans. It's not your fault they don't know how to dress. Sure it's 95 degrees out, but who the **** cares? You look ******* sick in your sports coat, bow tie, and lobster pants. As the sun starts to creep into your eyes you touch your head to see if you remembered to wear your shades. **** -- they aren't there. Immediately you realize you're a ******* idiot -- obviously they're hanging around your neck on your Croakies.With the tailgate in sight, you hear the voice: "Spare some change, sir?" Are you ******* kidding me? You are not in the mood. Not only are you late for the tailgate, but you just stepped in a puddle and now your top siders are ******* drenched, and now this? "No I don't have any change, but I do have some advice: GET A ******* JOB!!" Doesn't he realize how ******* easy it is for your Dad to get you a job with one of his golfing buddies? As you walk away, you give him the finger. Victory is sweet. Now, even if they couldn't tell by your clothes, everyone will know that you're better than them. Of course you are, after all, you're the Southern preppy bro. Often spotted at SEC schools such as Ole Miss, Georgia, or Tennessee, Southern preppy bros are brave as ****. You really have to be when everyone wants to kick your ass just because of what you are wearing. Southern prep bros love designer brand clothing even more than those sluts on "Sex and the City." Having a Lacoste croc, Polo horse, or trying-to-kill-himself Brooks Brothers sheep somewhere on your clothes immediately validates you as a true Sothern preppy bro. After they get decked out, Southern preppy bros can be found googling moonshine recipes beneath their Confederate flag in their frat house bedroom listening to some Kenny Chesney song with a fat pinch of dip lodged in their lower lip. A favorite pastime rivaled only by their love of pastel v-neck sweaters and veiled racism is their ability to make girls think they are "gentlemen." For some ridiculous reason, Southern girls demand to be treated like "ladies." Bros ******* hate this, but because of their resourcefulness, Southern preppy bros have adapted. By doing **** that other bros across the country would never do -- such as pulling out chairs, holding doors open, and actually going out on dates with girls -- Southern preppy bros are able to achieve the goal they share with bros across the county: Getting Laid. So the next time you see a bro out at the bar sipping whiskey with a haircut that looks as though he just got done filming "Two a Days," don't call him a tool or yell at him to get back to ******* his farm animals. He may refuse to pound your fist since it's "too ghetto" but shake his hand, he's a bro and the last thing this world needs is more bro on bro violence


Senior Member
I usually try to avoid getting sucked into these, but here are some observations from a student at a southern-ish school on why this is terrible/inaccurate.

1. Nobody actually dresses like that for a football game. It would be laughed at and perceived as 'trying too hard.' We/they actually do dress well for the most part, but not to the clownish extent expressed above.
2. 99% of the folks at tailgates are decent people, contribute to the community, etc.
3. Kenny Chesney isn't all that great...Far too "Nashville."
4. All this does is perpetuate a stereotype. Sure, it may be 'satire,' but stuff like this grinds my gears.

Mississippi Mud

Senior Member
Let's have at this:

First, few Southern frat boys listen to something akin to Kenny Chesney. Alt country is in; pop country is out. Second, while veiled racism is pervasive on Southern campuses, it isn't displaying a battle flag in your dorm room. Finally, there are no homeless near the stadia in Oxford or Athens.

Knowing your subject is important in satire.


Honors Member
I thought the only people who called each other "bro" were sitcom idiots...or the writers for them I guess...or kids who watch them and don't know better...not real people
I thought the only people who called each other "bro" were sitcom idiots...or the writers for them I guess...or kids who watch them and don't know better...not real people

No... they are all too real, my friend. Although in my neck of the woods they tend to prefer distressed dark denim and Armani Exchange or Ed Hardy t-shirts. As someone who has almost eaten at the Cheesecake Factory where "The Situation" used to be employed, I envy you your lack of exposure.

By the way, I just looked up the prices of those shirts out of curiosity -- makes Mercer and Brooks seem like incredible value.


Active Member with Corp. Privileges
I thought the article was funny but a bit exaggerated. Didn't one of the founders of Pennington and Bailes wear a pair of whale pants to a college football game and that's how they got the idea of making Pennington and Bailes?


Senior Member
Having recently attended Football games at a Southern ACC school, I can assure you that the attire described is least for undergraduate fraternity pledges. I saw lots of embroidered trousers; some with the school mascot, most with a "fun" item like martini glasses. Blue blazers were ubiquitous as were BD shirts, bowties and either loafers or topsiders. As for the rest of the post....




Active Member with Corp. Privileges
The attire in the OP is accurate at our tailgate. Our fraternity has a sort of rank when it comes to the way we dress. Pledges wear jacket and tie, second and third years normally wear jacket and/or tie, and seniors show up with a button down or polo and chinos. The critter pants and sperrys are the norm. This isnt a mandatory thing for the actives, but it's been our fraternity's tradition to dress up for football games. At UofK, there is especially a lot of people in jackets and ties in October, because we go to Keeneland in the afternoon and make it to the football game that evening.
But I really hate this southern frat boy stuff. Makes a lot of classy guys look silly just because they chose to join a fraternity. Just because I dress nice, dip tobacco and hold the door open for all ladies, doesnt mean that I am looking to get laid.


Active Member with Corp. Privileges
I'm a big fan of dressing up to games although its a rare site at my college. Don't mind the whole fratty look either, since it's just the youth's interpretation of trad. I'm guilty of it sometimes since I am still in school but I've toned it down as I have gotten older. Will stop wearing the croakies and Vineyard Vines polos as soon as I graduate. Plus many of those college kids eventually grow up and become us.


Honors Member
trying-to-kill-himself Brooks Brothers sheep

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