How to Pick Up Chicks! Clothes, Body Language & Attitude

If you’re single and in a setting (bar) where you might, or your purpose is to, meet someone for future dating…

What should you wear?

According to scientific studies, women are attracted to men wearing the color blue.

Blue gives an image of a person who is “stable, faithful, constant and always there.”

The blue guy is a fantastic candidate for a long-term relationship — someone who’s dependable, monogamous and can match his own clothes.

Is there a color to avoid?  Stay away from “squished caterpillar yellow-green” which is said to repel both sexes equally.

For other colors review, see What Color Says.

What body language and gestures will give you the best chance?

What to look for in her movements:


When attracted to someone we tend to preen or groom ourselves subconsciously, by smoothing down our hair or clothes.  If she’s adjusting or stroking her hair, making jewelry adjustments that can be a sign that she’s interested in you.

Also any movement tilting the head back or that exposes her neck is a positive sign!

Extended Eye contact

She looks at you then looks away!

Your body language and actions:


It works for her; it’ll work for you. Try combining a grooming gesture such as straightening your tie, with a smile and a gaze.

Open Body Positioning

Men who don’t fold their arms across their chests are perceived as more attractive, and potent.

Extended Eye contact

(Take off the shades inside, let her see your eyes!)

Once you’ve zeroed in on a target, lock eyes with her for a full five to six seconds, then smile and drop your gaze. Don’t stare (that’s stalking!!), just give her a smoldering come-hither look and look away. Do this at least three times in a ten to fifteen-minute period.

Your target needs to know it’s her you’re flirting with, and eye contact is a universal signal of openness.

Dominant Image

Women are biologically attracted to more dominant men!

To attract women, stand tall with your shoulders back, with your feet 6-10 inches apart, and your toes pointing outward to appear more dominant.

If you’re sitting, keep your legs wide apart at the knees, but your heels together.

Feel free to take up some space. According to spatial psychologists, where you are in a room (and what you’re doing) has a lot to do with your ability to attract women.

Want to be the guy who gets noticed? Stand in the center of the room, standing up tall (to be seen) and moving around (also increases visibility).

Hold your head up, and speed up your speech and gestures to appear more assertive.


If she’s looking at you – act on it!  Men take a while before they get the hint and this time delay may mean it’ll be too late.  Wait too long and they’ll likely lose interest.

Walk up and start a conversation.

Once you and your flirting target have started talking, smile and maintain eye contact as she is speaking, and focus all of your attention on what they are saying.

There is rarely anyone more attractive than someone who finds you utterly fascinating.


Body Stance

This is something we learned in the article about JOB INTERVIEWS!

People are most comfortable with and attracted to people who are “like” themselves (in dress, mannerisms, thoughts, etc.).

Try to “mirror” your flirting target’s behavior, body position, and mannerisms such as speech speed and volume, etc.

If she leans forward, you lean forward. If you are mirroring someone’s behavior, they’ll begin to feel as though the two of you are connected and “in tune.”

This seems like converse advice, but it’s OK to show some weakness (it’s not a job interview so) you may squat down to talk to her if she’s sitting (you were standing), this gives her the feeling of power, but you know who really has the power!

What not to do:

According to body language experts, you shouldn’t fold your arms or chew on gum, ice or your fingernails. Folded arms are a sign of defensiveness or being closed.   Chewing indicates anxiety or frustration, neither of which are very attractive emotions.

Never cover your face or mouth with your hand, or scratch your nose, chin or ear. All symbols of lying!!


If you want a woman’s phone number, be a man and ask for it. Don’t pull that feeble move of handing the lady your business card and expecting them to reciprocate.

Don’t wait a week to call. Playing it cool irritates women. Two or three days are plenty of time to wait.

Don’t wait until the last minute to ask for a date. Give them a chance to look forward to it. (On the other hand, in the early stages of a new relationship (first month) never ask for a date several months in advance.  Make sure the relationship is something both parties want to pursue before you get locked into plans you may not want to keep.)

Be a gentleman. That means paying for dinner, holding the door open, and using your table manners.

Be yourself. If you have to be phony it won’t work out for either of you!